Passion as I am discussing it,  is a strong feeling of enthusiasm or excitement about doing something.  When you are experiencing something that you feel passionate about you are:

                     -you feel alive
                        -in the zone               
                 -time passes quickly   
                 -you are immersed

When you experience any of these feelings, most likely you are engaged in activity that you are passionate about. 

However, some of us as we have grown have become overloaded with cares and obligations of life.  We are too stressed and overburdened to feel passionate about anything.  It is important that we take steps to slow down and live a life that is not so entangled with obligations and stress.

How can we do this?  The first step is to learn to care for ourselves.  We need to learn to engage in self-care.  Many times this is the first thing that stops when we become overburdened and taxed.  Basic self care includes exercise, proper sleep hygiene, eating a nutritionally balanced diet, staying hydrated and creating a positive support network.  Utilizing meditation and being mindful can help us learn to "live in the moment" and be fully present during tasks.  This will help us tune into what our experience is during various activities that we engage in.

We also must learn to s-l-o-w d-o-w-n.  Life for many of us has become a 24/7 job.  There are no down days, no days to just be.  Just as we do not live to eat but eat to live, we must learn that we do not live to engage in activities but engage in activities to bring fulfillment to our lives.  

Set a goal of prioritizing activities and commitments in your life. Learn to say, "No."  If you think about it the PTA can function without you, your child's class will be able to have enough parents for the field trip, etc.  Be committed to having one day a week to just be,  no commitments!  Let this day be a day committed to fun and play…that is best kind of self-care!

Set aside time each week to focus on simplifying your life.  Work on reducing clutter.  If you haven't used something in a year, chances are you won't use it in the future.  Chuck it, donate it, pass it on to a loved one or sell it on Craig's List.

By lowering your stress level and de-cluttering your life you can become more emotionally available.  By being emotionally available you can experience your feelings, be more aware of your needs and wants, and be free to find your passion in life.

Finally,  ask yourself what you enjoyed as a child?  What was it you spent hours doing? What are you really good at? What activities are you drawn to? Ask friends what they see as your strengths.  Don't be afraid to go out and try new things.  

Life is an adventure, go out and live it!

Who hasn't been so angry they couldn't think straight? This can happen when we get triggered emotionally. When we get triggered, it is impossible to act or speak rationally. Our limbic system takes over and we function without the help of our pre-fontal cortex, which is the regulator of our behavior. When we allow ourselves to "see red" we are literally at the mercy of our limbic system...we lose the ability to control our behaviors. 

Our bodies receive a rush of adrenaline which puts us in that "fight or flight" mindset.  If we can slow down our body 's response we can gain our control back. That is why you hear so many people say "count to ten." It literally can take as little as ten seconds to calm down our system. However, we must practice to do this!

Tips to NOT "Flip Your Lid"
1. Learn to recognize when you are angry so you can stop/slow this process when it begins.
What does your body feel like? Where do you "feel" the anger in your body first? What happens when you are angry? 
2. Learn to recognize what your anger triggers are to help you be more aware of when anger occurs.
Which situations are you most likely to angry in? 
3.Take a time out and walk away.
Engage in deep breathing or change your focus of attention.  
4.Journal incidents of anger writing exactly what occurred.
Look closely for patterns that occur. What was the "trigger"? This could be words, actions or behaviors.  Is there anyone else in your life that the behavior, words, actions remind you of? Do you have a life-pattern of becoming angry in this type of situation?
5.Try to unmask the feeling under the anger: fear, hurt, frustration,disappointment, jealousy, shame, embarrassment, anxiety. Then think about what thought you are linking to that feeling.
When did you first feel this way and think that thought? If you believe what you are thinking what does it mean about you? 
6. Help yourself see that this  cognitive distortion that you are believing about yourself is not true.
What is the evidence against this negative self belief? Make a "truth" card with evidence against this negative thought to carry with you. 
7. Spend more time in activities that relax you. 
What helps you feel peaceful and calm? Activities do not need to be long...maybe a cup of tea with honey, a favorite cup of Joe from Starbucks, reading a favorite poem or taking a walk around the block. 
8. Have some fun!
What makes you giggle or laugh? What activities make you feel centered and connected with others?
9. Increase your physical activity.
Go to the gym. Ride a bike. Take a dance class. Run up and down your stairs. Play with the kids at the park.
10. Try something new.
Master an activity that you haven't done before...rock climbing, dancing, woodworking, writing.

We all have the ability to master our anger.  It takes practice and awareness to do so.  If you are facing a chronic issue with anger therapy can help you increase your awareness and help you uncover the emotions underneath. You can learn tools and techniques that can help you stop/slow your anger before it amps up!